Friday, June 30, 2006
Lezzing association style
This is a random free association writing assignment I did years ago. I found it on my hard drive and it made me laugh. Hope it makes something. Happy Independence Day!

I am not one of those lesbians.

I am not one of those lesbians either.

I am not changing my name to Thunder Raincloud. I do not play softball. I do not play golf. I do not play tennis. I do not play pool, I am not your fresh-faced gym coach or your spiky-haired poet or your naturopathic earth mother. I have never owned Birkenstocks. I am not one of those lesbians.

I am not the most fashionable girl in the room, I am not among the entertainment industry’s elite, I will very likely never appear in the birthday party pictures in the Lesbian News, I am not a Dinah Shore regular. I will not go to a bar where the bouncer sneers at men. I am not one of those lesbians.

I am probably not going to rent a U-Haul on any date, I am almost certainly never going to read Andrea Dworkin again, I am quite sure I will never attend the Michigan Womyn’s Music Festival, in fact, I am not, nor will I ever, spell women with a Y or an I. I am not vacationing in Northhampton and I am not spending my hard-earned money on Indigo Girls tapes. I am not one of those lesbians.

I am not opposed to all pornography. I have no desire whatsoever to process any issues. I have never been available to grab a cup of chai tea either before or after Starbucks found out about it. I am not excluding wheat from my diet. I am not one of those lesbians.

I am not going to stop working in the HIV industry because you think I should be focusing my energy in women’s space, I am not going to stop having primarily male friends because you call me a male coddling fembot. I am not going to throw away one false eyelash because you think I have been coerced into collaborating in my own oppression, I am not about to wear tye-dye ever again, I did it in college and only because the sixties were back. I am not going to cut my hair short in order to find a girlfriend not matter how much it might help.

I am not one of those lesbians.

Enjoy your weekend!!!
Stumble It!


Blogger Sachi said...

I'm telling you... you're missing out on the Birks.... But then, what else would a sock-knitter say other than "Birks... good..."

Blogger Uccellina said...

Except you're totally one of those lesbians who processes issues.

Blogger Uccellina said...

Oh - gak - grammar - "one of those lesbians who process."

Blogger Laurie Ann said...

We're glad you are who you are.

Blogger Gwen said...

Awesome. :)

Blogger Elizabeth McClung said...

"male coddling fembot" - gee, what a great insult - you get along with men, you're no longer fully human?

I never realized how many lesbian groupings I DON'T fit into - now I am slightly depressed.

Blogger tk said...

I'm with Sachi.. I love Birks... and a little lipstick too....

Blogger tk said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

Blogger Shananigans said...

I enjoyed reading that. Apparently I am sort of one of those lesbians, except for the actually being a lesbian part. And I prefer Tevas to Birks as they are leather-free. I guess that's called a hippie?

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