Wednesday, July 13, 2005
As promised...butt sex!
So last night was Stitch n' Bitch original. Great crowd, fun conversation. We discussed:
  • pens, though I missed that conversation (unfortunately),
  • math and how girls are told that math is hard and peer pressure sets in so we all become math idiots instead of the math geeks we should have been with a little practical application and a half-way decent teacher rather than Mrs. Shakib, an Israeli former drill sergeant who was not particularly nice.
  • Karl Rove (who is responsible for everything bad) and Scott McClellan who got his ass whipped by Helen Thomas and the rest of the White House press corps yesterday. I enjoyed watching this like a ten year old boy in 1977 likes watching Star Wars. Basically, I'm jumping up and down alone in my living room screaming "Go Helen!!!!"
  • Wimpy knitters who disappear during the summer despite the availability of SUMMER YARNS!
  • How gay porn is better than all other porn because everyone is attractive and there are no fake body parts
  • My guest starring role in a Chi Chi LaRue feature entitled Gold Diggers. Which happens to be gay porn featuring quite a bit of butt sex. You won't find my real name attached to this flick because I have a porn name. No really, I actually do have a porn name.
This is one of those things you did not know about me. OK, a few of you know but not most of you. Now I did this particular flick almost a decade ago and it was decent money and at the time all of my friends were doing it - except they were not non-sexual extras and I was. Here is the basic plot:

A rich guy fakes his death and all of his friends (who are gold diggers) must have butt sex with each other in order to get his money. Where do I fit in? I am the sister of the "deceased" (yes, really) and I get the house in the Hamptons during the reading of the will. I cry very melodramatically during said reading which no one has seen because everyone who has ever watched this video has fast-forwarded through this part because it is plot exposition and features no butt sex!

For the final reveal, what is my porn name? you ask. OK, it is really dorky. You know the saying "Faith an' Begorra"? It's an Irish saying sort of meaning "Well I'll be!". Well, my stage name is Ann Begora. Seriously, is that not totally dorky!

With all of that to muse upon, have a great day!
Stumble It!


2 Comments:

Blogger Christie said...

FAITH!!! You're a PORN STAR!?!?! Sweet! I would have never guessed. Then again, I would have never guessed you were a lesbian either, so I guess I'm just a bad guesser! :D

Anonymous Anonymous said...

OMG Faith... you are my hero! Or, more appropo...heroine.

So sorry I missed Tues. I really wanted to be there, but my kid was busy being a rockstar and my presence was demanded. Yes, Fallopian gigged at the Key Club so I was a rockstar step-monster for the evening. You have to see them! So punk rock. And (they'd really kill me for saying this) so doggone cute.

You know I'm the kid of a math masters having, kick ass aerospace engineer mom so I'm totally bummed that I missed the math conversation. And Karl Rove/Scott McClellan... I could go on forever. All that AND wimpy knitters? *Sigh* Anywho, I never would have pegged you as a pornstar - sexual OR non-sexual. Swear, you, Laurie and Ellen are inspiring me. This whole living out loud thing is awesome!

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