Graveyards for dummies, Pt. 1

OK - so I've started my Hallowe'ening. It is undoubtedly my favorite holiday of the year.

1. I get to craft my ass off
2. I get to give away candy
3. I get to dress up
4. It's very morbid and dark (I was soooo goth in high school.)
   

Now that I have a house, all of this has been cranked up a notch or two.

No way in hell am I going to be that lame ass house that gives out pencils. I bought candy. Real chocolate name-brand candy. Ohhhhh yeah.

Of course, husband has been picking through the bags, so no doubt I'm going to have to go back to Tarzhay in the coming weeks.

Two weeks ago I pulled out every Martha Stewart Living October issue. Since I own every issue except the premiere, this was not an exaggeration (dirty little secret!!!).

I sat on my couch, post-its in hand searching for all of her best and creepiest ideas, because frankly, if Martha knows anything, it's how to do creepy.

I decided I would do graveyard this year.

First: purchase polystyrene insulation at your local building supply/garden store (OSH, HomeDepot, Lowe's, etc.). It comes in sheets of 8' x 5'.

An 8x5 foot sail is neither easy to get to the cash register nor into one's car. I broke it up into quarters in the parking lot. This is a very noisy activity (sounds a lot like a gun) but well worth it. (By the way, if there had been photos of me trying to get it to the cash register, they would have been priceless. Thank god the only cameras were store security and I'm sure they've seen worse.)

Trace out the shape of your tombstones. I looked online and found some awesome stones at this website. Also, just a google image search for gravestones is a great resource.

Polystyrene is very, very messy. Cut the polystyrene with a drywall saw. Quick and super easy. Cut out your tombstones in a place that you don't care about having little white styrofoam thingies all over (grammar much?). I worked in the alley behind my house.

Martha recommends using sandpaper to smooth out the edges once they're cut. Personally, I think leaving them a little raw looks more authentic.

We had some left over gray latex concrete paint from home improvement projects. It was perfect. Sponged it on with one of those loofah looking sponges. It dried quickly and very easily. You could leave it like that and it would look OK in the dark but you know I gotta go one or two steps further. I added stone texture spray paint in a gray stone. Perfection on a stick!

While all of this was drying, I got out the three rolls of flower bed fencing (had for 10 bucks also at Lowe's). I laid them out on the concrete also in the alley and took a can of black spray paint to them. I didn't get every nook and cranny because it actually looks a little more spooky sort of done haphazardly.

These dried super fast since it was a nice day and I only sprayed a thin layer of paint.

Next: decorations, epitaphs and setting up the boneyard!