Friday, December 30, 2005
Happy New Year!!!!

This year there will be MORE photos! I promise. Lots of photos of Los Angeles and of me doing wonderful things all over my fair city. This particular photo is of me roasting pumpkin peeps over Peggy's bonfire at Dockweiler beach.

Currently I am sitting in the knitting/art/fashion section of the downtown public library, which I absolutely love! I am typing on a stack of books which includes the biography of Edith Head, a really fabulous millinery book that I have never seen before, and some inspirations for clothing design. I am truly inspired. I talked to my dear friend Laurie last night and decided that if I don't plant some damn seeds for 2006, nothing's gonna grow. So, taking her lead (and being a really obsessive list person myself) I am going to write here my preliminary TO DO and TO DON'T list for this upcoming year. I reserve the right to change this list fairly frequently and not necessarily in public. Loving y'all!!!

Money Things:
-Get a job. This is key.
-Negotiate a good salary and don't accept first offer.
-Spend less money on books and more time at the library
-Put away a significant chunk of cash for new house!!!
-stop buying fabric!!!
-Put all the stuff I have stored away up on ebay because it's not making any money sitting in my closet

Good Stuff I'm Learning in Therapy
-Exercise sometimes
-Make hard decisions rather than leaving them up to someone else
-Make a mistake or two
-Say "no"
-Do at least one thing every day that makes me proud of myself
-Join a yoga class
-Enliven my garden a little by watering more frequently
-(stolen from Laurie) Stop procrastinating. Just stop it already.

-Take another sewing class
-Start writing the other book in my head
-Work on my website

The Not-To-Do List (first two stolen from Laurie because apparently I need to not do many of the same things):
-Say "yes" to things just because someone springs them on me at the last minute. Instead, say "Let me think about it and get back to you."
-Choose the known over the unknown just because it's comfortable.
-Say what I think others want me to say

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Monday, December 19, 2005
It is only 5 days until the real Christmahanakwanzaka/Birthday festivities begin. I am feelin' sorta festive. I just received my new Martha Stewart in the mail and I'm always feeling like I should be making something from that. Especially now that the season is actually seasonably cool, I feel a little bit like doing the season this year.

Of course then there is the ambivalence that creeps in. I think, "maybe I'll be more into it next year. I'll start my presents in August and have them done by December 1. I'll be perfect! Yes, perfect!"

Yikes. How did I get this way. Wasn't I the non-conformist chick at some point? Didn't I fight the power? Was I always trying to make everyone else happy? The answers seem to be yes, somewhat and yes.

Ultimately, I think part of it involves growing up. I'm not going to be fighting every system "just because" for the rest of my life. I think my next cause needs to be me.

Part of it is the little nervous breakdown previously alluded to. Hmm...50's housewife much? Too bad they didn't have prozac. On the other hand, too bad I don't have Valium and speed.

On that note, "Peace" friends. Make somebody happy this week. Especially if that somebody is you.
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Wednesday, December 14, 2005
Lady of Leisure?
Yesterday I had big plans.
Plans to see Wes and Grant and Kristin.
Plans to go to the Small Business Administration.
Plans to go to the bank and finish holiday shopping (I use the term holiday because in fact a)I am shopping for holidays b) I am not just shopping for Christmas or Chanukkah I am shopping for all of them so off my damned back!!!

I did only one of those things and then wished for someone (I am also an atheist so I was pretty bummed at this point) to strike me dead. I got the mother of all migraines. On the freeway.

Let me tell you something. The freeway is no place for a migraine. It is dangerous and I actually found myself wishing that a cop would pull me over. I went looking through my car (at 80 miles an hour on the 134 freeway) for something to throw up in. I thought of pulling over but migraines do not get better without drugs and my drugs were in my nightstand (excellent place for them!). So I drove. I drove like a maniac thinking, as long as I do not pass out behind the wheel of my car, everything will be ok.

It was, ultimately. After 5 hours of brain crushing, cell killing, pain! Woo hoo. So much for leisure.

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Friday, December 09, 2005
Maybe it's Stockholm Syndrome
I'm still trying to take the phone to the bathroom and going to get the mail is like sneaking out of Alcatraz. Seriously, I feel like I'm doing something vaguely naughty by going down to my car. Currently sitting at "too small desk" surrounded by not one, not two but three phones!!!!

Arrrgh! They're attacking me! They are silent and deadly.

That histrionic outburst brought to you by exactly one week of being Metro Limousine-less. I admit, we have our habits.

So far so good. Michael loves his new employment. We're finally completely moved out of the 3rd Street garage and the filing cabinet is slowly being shredded into little cross-cut morsels.

I am learning to live with the gift of three weeks without having to look for work (but if y'all know of anything coming up in January - please let me know.)

I saw a movie alone for the first time in years and years. It was fun for the first hour. After that I started getting anxious like I was supposed to be somewhere or do something productive. I had to convince myself that keeping my ass in the seat was actually what I was "supposed" to be doing. Crazy much?

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Monday, December 05, 2005
Walmart and Jesus
Sunday I did the Ventura Holiday Street Faire. "How did it go?" you ask. Well, thanks for asking.

I came to a whole bunch of conclusions on Sunday.

First conclusion: Walmart has turned Americans into people who only want to spend $3.99. For anything. Everyone said I make really pretty stuff but...well...they really only wanted to spend $3.99 so....thanks! I really hate Walmart. Really. If you shop there, I don't want to know about it. I seriously don't care that they have stuff for a lot cheaper. They are asking us all to sell our souls for a savings of a few cents. Don't do it.

Second conclusion: No offense, but people in Ventura are weird. Miss Teen Whatever was shakin' her groove thing on a platform in a skanky ass dress at a holiday fair! The only thing missing was the pole. Seriously. There were also a lot of people wearing Renaissance Faire costumes. At a holiday street fair. Weird.

Third conclusion: Jesus is the light - or so said the staff member at the thrift store where Rabbi Brian of Religion Outside the Box went looking for lamps. Seriously. When he asked if they had lamps, the clerk told him that Jesus is the light. Out of the freakin' blue. To a rabbi. Wearing a kippah (Jewish beanie thing to all of y'all who don't know this word). Brilliant!

Fourth conclusion (and goal for the week): I need to actually carry my camera with me if I plan to post photos on my blog. Since my camera was sitting in my too small desk, I have no photos. I will however, resolve to carry my camera with me this week of new-found (dash or no dash?) freedom.

Anyway, those were just some of the many conclusions I came to on Sunday. In addition to the goal stated above, I also plan to take a few walks. Swing on a swing and meet with someone at the Small Business Administration regarding my next life.

Kisses to all y'all.


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Thursday, December 01, 2005
My Big News!!!
As of today, Metro Limousine has officially merged with DIVA Limousine.

Michael just left the house to start his new job as Senior Account Manager.

I am here deciding what to do with the rest of my life.

We had an all-staff meeting last night (which, by the way was super-fun) to let all of our fabulous drivers know that they are now employees of DIVA. They all got raises and, despite fear of change, I think they'll all be happy there.

Back to me. What am I going to do with the rest of my life? Well, this is an excellent question.

This weekend Allison, of SuperCrafty and I will be selling our wares at the Ventura Holiday Street Fair. If y'all want to come out and see us, we'll be right on Main Street. It'll be brisk and sunny and a totally fun day.

After this weekend, I'd like to start working somewhere, at least temporarily, so if you know of any jobs for a creative and super organized person, let me know.

I have big plans though. I am terrified to say it out loud here on this blog but I'm working on starting my own business. Really. I'm working on my business plan. Currently I have 21 pages of blather that needs to somehow be organized into something workable.

Between that and rewriting my resume, I've got some work to do over the next couple of weeks. By the way, my birthday is three weeks from tomorrow. Just so you know.

Also, Happy World AIDS Day y'all.

This year's theme (when did we start having themes?) is accountability. Really. That's what CNN said. Let's start with virtually every leader of every country and their health ministers. Accountability my ass. You know the right wingers are thinking, accountability...that's right, it's the (Africans'/homos/junkies/sluts) fault. They should be held accountable.

Take a minute to remember that 40 million people are living with HIV worldwide and we're still not treating it like a serious issue. Of course, in this house, we treat it with a combination therapy of sarcasm, disdain, Fortovase, Epivir, Norvir, and Zerit but I'm just sayin...
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